BUNGLE


Without going into the details and ideology of the birth chart, you must know, in order to understand Janine’s life, a few basics.
Those who read the stars, sometimes for a living, determine one’s zodiac sign and the placement of planets at the exact time and place where one is born. Knowing this, one can see in advance the challenges that will be faced in life. One can also foresee one’s life’s meant-to- be partner, one’s hobbies, one’s likes and dislikes. All of this is based upon the belief that the motions of stars and planets influence or determine the life of a human. Would be astrologers study for years and some even take university degrees in order to deepen their knowledge of movement/i.e. orbits of planets and relative positions of them at the time of a birth.
Janine’s parents were not adherents of any particular religion or belief. They certainly didn’t consult an astrologer when they decided to have sex and produce a child in October of 1942. If they had consulted any person schooled in the ways of planetary motion, they would have known that they should have waited until after WWII to reproduce. Janine was meant to have been born in April of 1947. Because she was born in 1942, her whole life was off kilter and she was always at odds with her own destiny. Not only was she born in the wrong year and the wrong month, she was born two weeks before the statistically normal end of her gestation period.
It was no wonder to anyone who understood such things that everything in Janine’s life was a side-ways.
There were major consequences for Janine. First, she met the person who would have been her life partner much too early. There was a ten-year difference in their ages. Thus, the attraction between them, built upon past lives together, came to nothing. Fizzled. They became friends but what would have been a predetermined life of bliss was not to be. Thereafter, Janine struggled with relationships and had periods of depression and deep sorrow. She could not understand this. She did the best she could and finally gave up trying.
Janine was often only one number away from winning state-wide lotto combination. Just a bit off. She would have been a millionaire if she had been born on the correct day and under the correct sign.
Janine was in an automobile that was hit by a train. She survived but was deeply shaken. Had she been at that crossing just a day later or an hour or two earlier, she would have missed the collision.
One day, she was thrown from a horse. She was only five years old. Her lip was cut and her knees were scuffed. She was not supposed to be on that horse at that stable on that day.
Thus, Janine’s life was a series of mess ups, and clumsy attempts to be what she perceived to be a “normal” human being.
It is not possible to right oneself with one’s destiny once one has entered upon this earth under a sky that is completely wrong.
….
Though Janine knew that something was amiss, she didn’t know quite what to do. As a young child, she suffered through winters of pneumonia and bronchial coughs and raging fevers. These were never meant for her. Nothing her attentive grandmothers and mothers did helped because there was no real help from the stars. Herbal salves and healing plasters applied to her small chest did nothing. She was made to lie on her back, head hanging down over the side of the bed, while vile drops were caused to flow into her nose and sinus cavities. She was taken to doctors. Tonsils were yanked. Shots were given. Various foods were declared bad for her. Of course, nothing worked. Her body was fighting against a terrible cosmic mistake. It was, that meek little body, too small and too weak to make a difference.
She was said to have “grown out” of these afflictions when she was about five years old. What had really happened was that her spirit and soul had come aligned, for a day, with the day of her destined birth. Everything in her tried very hard for a rebirth. The strength of the alignment gave her a restart that was strong enough to heal childhood illnesses. However, nothing else was righted.
She continued to “just miss” so many possibilities. She almost made As on her report cards. She was almost an excellent student. She nearly won a scholarship for her first year at college. She almost made the dean’s list.
And this was the life she led.
Food and the ingestion of it became an anathema later in life. She deplored eating out and thus had a very small circle of friends. Because, of course, she chose all the wrong friends. She didn’t like preparing food or sitting down to eat it. Most edibles caused her bowels to hold on. The bowels, of course, are the seat of destiny. Living in the security of a meant-to-be life will cause the bowels to flow freely and comfortably. If one is muddling through the wrong life, the bowels will be blocked and only deep spiritual work will allow a release.
Janine didn’t know any of this. She purchased laxatives and ate a lot of fiber. This was not easy because she loathed most food, including the very fibrous varieties.
Janine drove a car. But she was always about to have an accident or lose a fender or miss a turn. Had she been born at the correct time and day and year, she would have been free of all of these possibilities. She might even have been a race car driver.
While shopping for clothing, she always seemed to choose and bring home the wrong sized garment. The colors and patterns she wore made her look freakish.
On walks in the woods, she always took the wrong turn and became lost. She eventually carried a cellular phone and a compass and a GPS device with her. She learned to accommodate and move through her mysterious lack of direction.
Her house was never clean and neat though she worked to make it so. Something was always missed or forgotten. Strange, basketball-sized dust bunnies appeared under chairs recently on recently mopped floors. How can that be. She tried and tried to get it right. For years.
The question that any astrologer worth their salt might ask is who got Janine’s life?
April 16, 1947
Absolutely no one of significance was born on this day. Janine’s absence left a very big hole. It wasn’t simply her life that was peculiarly tilted by several degrees off norm, it was the whole world that missed her. In the scheme of things, the void Janine left opened up a period of time called the “cold war.” In Texas City, a deadly industrial accident happened. This was the fault of Janine. And so much more. Janine was to have been born an Aries and, in Chinese reckoning, a Pig with associated element Fire. She would have been driven and passionate. Although it is not certain, it is likely Janine would have taken her passion and ambition into political activism. She would likely have risen to her full potential and even become a reigning figure, perhaps changing the landscape of American foreign and domestic policies for the good of justice.
As it was, Janine lived in such a haphazard manner that she was barely able to cast ballots in local elections.
….
No use wondering about what might have been. As it was, the Janine born on October 13, 1942 was no good at sports. She always the missed the thrown ball or the hammered serve or the ball set up on the tee. She struck out, was not asked to partner, and was left out.
She tried playing goalie for her school’s field hockey team. but, of course, everyone scored off her. Her lurches and lunges were late and in the wrong direction.
She hit the finger that held the nail. She was always bruised somewhere on her body.
Dogs approached her from oblique angles and then, just as they neared Janine’s proffered treat, they veered away. Cats sat as far across the room from her as possible.
She sang off pitch and was not encouraged to join vocal ensembles.
Her sleep was interrupted by mysterious visitations. Doctors call this phenomenon sleep paralysis. She knew, however, that the visages present at the foot of her bed bore messages. If she could only understand!
The messages certainly contained hints of what might have been, sent to allow her a peek at what she’d missed. They were cruel messages. Nobody wants to know what might have been. It was just as well she couldn’t understand or remember them the next morning.
Things could have changed. Her slanted life was not inevitable. One well-placed asteroid could have thrown the earth’s orbit off and, thus, Janine’s destiny might have been rehabilitated. But then most of the world would have experienced yet another extinction event.
She might have become an astronaut and spent some time circling the globe from outer space. Or just crawling about in her capsule for a few months. That might have reset things.
On the bright side, her daily actions had no deadly ramifications. Yes, she returned from grocery shopping with all the wrong items. But she learned to eat whatever showed up in her cupboards. Yes, she missed appointments and or recorded them incorrectly on her calendar. Sometimes whole months passed without her notice.
One can get used to almost anything.
The most curious thing was that Janine 1942 died on exactly the same day that Janine 1947 was destined to die. Nobody really knew this unless they had read her birth chart. Still, how remarkable. She did not outlive herself.
On the day of her death, the pictures on her wall stayed straight.

She would play it all differently next life.

LLyn De Danaan November 2023

About Llyn De Danaan

LLyn De Danaan is an anthropologist and author. She writes fiction and nonfiction. Katie Gale: A Coast Salish Woman's Life on Oyster Bay was published by the University of Nebraska Press. She is currently a speaker for Humanities Washington.
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